Even in the darkness, her wide-open eyes were clearly visible.
Xenon, who had been staring blankly at Anelli frozen in shock, rose to his feet.
Having reached a conclusion, he felt sleep might finally come this time. As he moved to return to the tent, Anelli, snapping back to her senses, quickly approached.
And then, without warning, she grabbed his arm.
"What?"
"Huh?"
"What on earth did you just say?"
Perhaps because she was bathed in moonlight, Anelli's face looked particularly pale and white.
"Why? Following you in death is my own choice, isn't it?"
Was it because he answered in such a casual tone? Anelli frowned and immediately scolded him.
"Don't joke."
"Do I look like I'm joking to you, Lady Anelli?"
The hand gripping Xenon's arm was clenched with immense strength.
Through it, he could roughly gauge just how shocked Anelli was now. Xenon lightly patted the back of Anelli's hand holding his arm and asked again.
"Did I seem to love you playfully? Like a childhood game?"
That would be a bit disappointing.
Rolling words she wouldn't hear within his mouth, Xenon calmly explained.
"I reconsidered from your perspective and reached my own conclusion."
"......"
Anelli's lips parted slightly. She seemed to find it absurd.
Xenon didn't particularly want to persuade her of his feelings. So he simply smiled faintly.
Then Anelli flinched and averted her gaze.
"If anything happens, just......"
The voice that escaped her lips was somewhat brusque and awkward.
"Grieving for me is enough."
"I refuse."
When he refused without room for reconsideration, Anelli released his arm and called his name with a sighing voice.
"Xenon."
"I didn't tell you not to die. Do as you please."
"You said you'd follow me in death!"
"Yes."
His nod was so casual that Anelli seemed at a loss for words.
Anelli, her lips twitching as she looked at Xenon with incredulous eyes, pressed her forehead and let out a long sigh.
'Just like parents facing a foolish son.'
Would a parent stand with that expression, ready to scold a child who'd caused trouble and returned?
Xenon found his own sudden reflection amusing and smiled faintly. Interpreting his smile in her own way, Anelli's expression hardened severely.
"Why would you do such a thing?"
"I told you, it's my choice. And I might not die, you know. If no trouble befalls you, Lady Anelli, I'd live on just fine."
Xenon's words followed the same logic as what Anelli had said to him.
But Anelli, with a stern face, reproached him.
"Don't be ridiculous. That's not something to say even as an empty platitude. You have a place to return to. Many people care for you. They wouldn't wish for your death either."
Good heavens, to hear such a fairy-tale moral lesson from Anelli's lips!
Considering her usual pessimistic view of the entire world, this was a change in attitude worthy of astonishment.
Moreover, Anelli didn't even seem properly aware that she had uttered such exemplary words.
'Declaring all humans in the world to be untrustworthy scum, yet preaching to me about the preciousness of bonds.'
Xenon fell silent for a moment with a peculiar expression. It was because he suddenly realized that he was the one who had drawn out this subtle change in her.
Xenon, blinking slowly, tilted his head back and looked up at the black sky.
Anelli was a woman unaccustomed to exchanging emotions.
So she was trying to express one-sided love in the only way she knew.
"Then what about your death, Lady Anelli."
But perhaps he could teach her. What it means to exchange emotions.
Was this thought of his arrogance?
"I do not wish for your death either."
Xenon, who had been gazing into the distance, calmly settled his mind before lowering his head.
"There are many who would grieve for me. But there is no one who would follow me in death. So it's fine."
"Such stubbornness......"
"But you have one, Lady Anelli. Someone who would follow you in death."
Me.
Unlike the voice that added it like a joke, there was no trace of laughter anywhere on Xenon's expression. Anelli, standing before him, was the same.
Anelli, who until just moments ago had been half-listening to Xenon's words as bravado, now finally seemed to realize that Xenon was truly serious.
Staring at Xenon with a distorted expression, she roughly swept back her bangs. She seemed to have completely forgotten that her hands were soiled from using her power earlier.
"Why would you go that far?"
Her face truly showed she couldn't understand.
Xenon raised a hand and lightly brushed the dust from Anelli's hair.
"Because there's only me."
He tidied her bangs and side hair, but Xenon didn't immediately withdraw his hand. Instead, he lightly stroked Anelli's cheek with his fingertips.
Her cheek had grown cold from exposure to the night air.
"Because I am the only 'human' you hold dear. Is it strange that I, too, consider the one who sees me as their only person, as my only one?"
Anelli, who had been hesitating, parted her lips as if to answer. But before she could utter anything, Xenon lowered his head.
Their lips were cold, but upon touching, warmth began to circulate as if they had been waiting.
Anelli's eyelashes, which had fluttered as if startled, soon settled quietly downward. Instead of pushing him away, she wrapped her arms around his neck.
The shared heat from the point of contact gradually brought the two to the same body temperature.
The unrealistically receding sounds of the surroundings, the floating sensation, and the warmth filling her embrace.
Xenon thought.
'It feels like a dream.'
Every moment shared with Anelli felt like a dream.
A dream he had no desire to wake from.
* * *
"So it wasn't a dream."
[Huh?]
At my inadvertent mutter, Mori jerked his head up and reacted.
I waved a hand at Mori like that, then furtively touched my lower lip.
"......"
I could feel the skin slightly swollen and taut. I didn't even need to touch it with my hand; just brushing it with the tip of my tongue was enough to know.
That moment last night, when I went to patrol the campsite and ended up locking eyes with Xenon, wasn't a dream.
'Then that entire conversation was real too.'
Touching my lips, I slowly recalled last night's conversation. In essence, it was one thing.
'Why follow me in death?'
Even thinking about it again, it's utterly absurd. I thought he might be acting recklessly, but his expression was so serious it left me flustered.
'Perhaps talking at night was the problem.'
Having that conversation when emotions were heightened, it might have been an impulsive outburst......
"Did you have something to say?"
I had unknowingly glared at Xenon and got caught. He, who had been some distance away tidying the campsite, looked puzzled and started to approach.
"No, it's fine."
I hastily turned my body and strode away, putting distance between us.
The reason was, I still hadn't properly decided what expression to wear when facing someone who said they'd follow me in death.
It was truly an unfamiliar feeling. At the time of my execution, far from anyone following me in death, there wasn't a single person to grieve for me.
Pretending to survey my surroundings as I paced, I saw Samuel dismantling the tent.
'Come to think of it, he was quite devoted too, wasn't he?'
I promptly approached him.
"Sir Samuel."
"Yes?"
Samuel only glanced at me without stopping his actions.
"You said you've regained all your memories, right?"
"That is correct."
"I have a question."
"Yes."
"What happened to you after the Captain of the past died?"
The hand rolling up the canvas stopped abruptly. Samuel, looking at me with a stiff face, frowned and averted his gaze.
"I waited until my human lifespan reached its end."
"......You didn't want to follow the Captain in death?"
"At that time, having become a puppet of the god, I had to fulfill my allotted lifespan. I was freed from being a puppet and received the goddess's guidance again only after fulfilling that lifespan."
Samuel attributed his inability to follow in death to the god. But in my opinion, even without such constraints, he probably wouldn't have followed the Captain in death.
Right, death isn't easy either. Xenon has the Magic Tower, his master, and his brothers; would he act so rashly?
I shook my head and turned my steps.
「If no trouble befalls you, Lady Anelli, I'd live on just fine.」
Xenon's voice, uttered so flatly, revived in my memory. He probably had no idea, but to me, that was no different from a threat.
Because the repose to be granted through the final authority could be interpreted as anything.
When I asked if repose was death, Dieris had answered.
「That differs for each individual. Those who wandered without a home will obtain the repose they each desire, and for some, that may be death.」
The repose each desires.
It's hard to definitively say the repose I desire is death, but inwardly, I thought it might be close.
With that mindset, what I would obtain at the end of this journey would ultimately be death.
But if I die......
"Lady Anelli, we're finished packing!"
Staring blankly at Xenon, who called my name with perfect composure, I forced myself to adjust my expression. Amidst the turmoil in my mind, I could recognize one clear fact.
The fact that he knows I hold him dear, and the fact that there is someone before my eyes who reciprocates that.
"Shall we depart now?"
"We should arrive within the day. Beyond that ridge is the Veladia Valley."
Xenon and Samuel took turns speaking to me.
I nodded and firmly secured the pouch containing Mori at my waist. Then, out of habit, I ran my fingertips over the bracelet.
The cracks on the gem's surface gave it a rough texture. Fortunately, it wasn't completely shattered, so its function remained.
Fiddling with the bracelet containing the Dullahans calmed my mind a little.
"Let's go now."
[Fi, finally, to be able to obtain repose... I can't believe it...]
Mori, squirming inside the pouch, spoke as if to himself. I glanced down at the pouch, then raised my head to confirm the direction we must go.
Everything ends beyond there. The Dullahans will regain their heads and obtain the repose they desire.
'And my repose too.'
I don't know if death is repose for me, but one thing is certain.
「Is it strange that I, too, consider the one who sees me as their only person, as my only one?」
That I don't even want to imagine Xenon's death.