Samuel glanced at Anelli's smoothly moving arm and gave a slight twitch of his lips.
“You are quite skilled.”
“Well, I did nothing but this sort of thing until I died. But you, my lord, are more adept than I expected.”
In truth, Samuel had deliberately requested this dance when a piece came on that did not require changing partners.
The music was slow, and long.
Long enough for a proper conversation.
“I merely learned a little as part of my education.”
“An excellent education, then. High society is overflowing with gentlemen whose skills are far inferior.”
Anelli retorted with a sneer and rolled her eyes.
The moment he realized her gaze was directed toward Xenon, standing alone, Samuel turned his body to block her view. It happened to be a part of the dance where they swept in a large circle across the floor.
“I am curious how much you have remembered.”
At those words, Anelli’s attention instantly focused on Samuel.
He had anticipated this reaction when he broached the subject, but seeing the effect firsthand gave Samuel a satisfaction beyond his expectations.
“I haven’t remembered anything.”
Anelli answered curtly. Then she lowered her gaze. Her neatly arranged eyelashes fluttered faintly.
“I merely saw. Fragments of the past.”
What were these fragments she saw? Samuel grew curious. Was there any scene in his own incomplete memories that he could share with her?
“And you, my lord? Do you have memories?”
“I… believe it is more accurate to say I acquired them.”
“How much?”
“Who I was, what I did, and what price I had to pay for it.”
How else could he describe it, other than to say it was bewildering?
In the monastery, through the divine power that had reacted to Anelli, Samuel too had regained a large amount of information in a short time.
But it felt less like he had remembered it and more like he had acquired knowledge from an external source.
“And what I must do now.”
“You… are also one of them.”
Anelli’s expression settled into something inscrutable. She looked at Samuel for a moment, then averted her eyes again.
For some reason, her refusal to look at him stirred an impatience within him, and Samuel opened his mouth as if to explain.
“I betrayed you.”
“You need not explain. You betrayed ‘her,’ and ‘she’ was disappointed in you.”
His explanation could not properly continue. Whatever she had seen, it seemed the fact that he was the first knight to betray her had been clearly conveyed.
Anelli glanced up at the silent Samuel, hesitated briefly, then added in a low voice.
“Thanks to that, I am here now.”
Her words were utterly unexpected.
“I am grateful to you, my lord. Had it not been for your choice, I would not exist.”
The eyes gazing back at him were direct and resolute. Through them, Samuel could tell. That she was sincere.
“But separate from that, you will not be forgiven.”
Though she must have seen the wavering in Samuel’s gaze, Anelli did not stop.
“I cannot forgive you. Because I am not her, I do not know her despair.”
It was an explanation bordering on cruelty.
“The person you betrayed is no more. So if any guilt remains within you, consider it your karma and bear it.”
“I do not consider you and her to be the same.”
“But the feelings you harbor are merely remnants of a bygone past.”
Anelli’s voice was firm.
“There is no other explanation.”
“You speak as if you know what my feelings are.”
“You loved and worshipped her. So isn’t it all too obvious?”
Muttering as if it were trivial, Anelli turned her gaze away. As it was precisely the moment to release hands and part, the conversation was cut short.
Unable to tear his eyes from Anelli’s elegant movements as her skirt fluttered, Samuel stepped forward briskly.
Grabbing her waist a beat too quickly, he opened his mouth in a somewhat urgent tone.
“But…”
“As I said, that is not me.”
Samuel knew it well too. Even to him, the woman before his eyes was a completely different person from the woman in his memories.
The primordial proxy of Death was a philanthropist, loved all things, tender-hearted yet steadfast in her convictions.
But the woman standing before him now was utterly worldly, selfish, indifferent, and cynical in all matters.
Reincarnation merely brings a soul into existence; it does not resurrect the same person.
Then, toward whom were these feelings directed? Something he himself could not yet distinguish—why was Anelli so certain?
“They could be directed at you, not her.”
“At me?”
Anelli let out a small laugh as if she had heard something ridiculous.
For a moment, an illusion arose as if small flower buds were blooming around her.
“What feelings could you possibly harbor for me? Curiosity? Pity?”
Of course, Samuel acknowledged that his first meeting with Anelli had not been entirely pleasant. The reason he took a deeper interest in her was also due to the less-than-ideal circumstances of Anelli Roam.
But curiosity or pity alone could not have brought him to this point. At the very least, Samuel knew he himself was not capable of that.
Perhaps sensing Samuel’s defiance, Anelli added with a laugh.
“You might have mistaken curiosity or pity for love. It is true our relationship is peculiar, and if old attachments were added to the mix, how much stronger would that illusion be?”
“Do you think I love you?”
“Not me. Her.”
Anelli uttered the words like a sigh. Samuel could say nothing to her as she stared intently at him.
“I think you desired her desperately, beyond mere worship.”
Samuel’s expression stiffened. At this very moment, he felt a question that even the word ‘love’ could not resolve suddenly clear up.
Ah, desire.
“To the point that, after betraying her and finding she would not look back at you, you willingly chose an uncertain reincarnation in hopes of somehow making amends.”
The romantic, beautiful word ‘love’ was insufficient. This feeling of Samuel’s was a desire he had never imagined he would experience in his lifetime.
“But Lord Samuel, there is no one to receive that feeling. Nor will there ever be.”
However, what Anelli failed to realize was that Samuel’s desire did not stem solely from that foolish betrayal in the past.
‘Perhaps this is…’
Samuel pressed his lips tightly together. It was a truth that should never pass the lips of one who had sworn to serve God all his life.
“I will not hinder you in your duties. Be it the monastery affairs, or likely your role as my guide—please carry on.”
The dance piece was nearing its end.
“First, after finding the other knights.”
The fluttering hems of their garments settled calmly, and finally, the musicians stopped playing.
Anelli took hold of her skirt, gave a light curtsy, and steadied her heated breath. Samuel likewise bowed his head to her in acknowledgment.
“……Yes, I will guide you to Veladia.”
Lowering his gaze to conceal his emotions, he spoke flatly.
“Your rest shall also be found there.”
In this journey, everyone would find the rest they sought.
All except Samuel.
Samuel’s desire would never be fulfilled. He easily realized this fact.
That this was the eternal punishment he bore for betraying her.
* * *
I blinked slowly, fixing my gaze on the distant scene.
I had expected someone to approach Xenon, left alone.
‘But I never imagined it would be Lilia.’
I saw Lilia, accompanied by her followers, smiling sweetly as she spoke to Xenon.
Her followers stood surrounding Xenon as if to block any escape route, making Xenon at their center look like a slender stray cat targeted by predators.
Of course, this does not mean Xenon was trembling or cowed. On the contrary, he stood with a cold expression I had never seen him show before.
‘What in the world are they talking about?’
After the dance ended, I deliberately moved slowly.
Since it wouldn’t be difficult to overhear their conversation from this distance anyway, eavesdropping would be easy as long as the surrounding people didn’t make a commotion and draw attention to me.
“My elder sister is not a research subject.”
Huh?
“The Magic Tower would likely find this issue extremely fascinating. I’ve heard rumors too. Scholars who devote their lives to research, excellent ones. I understand how intriguing Elder Sister’s case must seem.”
“I said she is not.”
“But if that weren’t the reason, how else could we explain the unprecedented visit of a guest from the Magic Tower? You said so yourself earlier. That you attended because of Elder Sister.”
Lilia put on an exceedingly sorrowful expression. I could see her followers chiming in consolingly around her.
“Surely the Magic Tower hasn’t concluded that Elder Sister is undead, has it?”
“Pardon?”
“When I asked the imperial mages, they said the only way for a living being to be revived is to become undead. Otherwise, no magic existing in this world can resurrect a life that has been beheaded….”
Lilia naturally brought up that my death had been ‘by beheading.’ The followers shuddered and mentioned the heinous crimes publicly attributed to me.
“Moreover, for monsters to behave so obediently… I hear there is a hierarchy among monsters. They say undead rank very high within it.”
At Lilia’s words, the followers made a fuss, shuddering and saying how scary it was. Xenon, sweeping a weary glance over them, made an effort to speak politely.
“It is true there is a hierarchy among monsters…”
But Lilia, of course, showed no intention of listening to Xenon’s rebuttal.
“Of course, everyone is trembling with anxiety. Still, we cannot send Elder Sister to a laboratory. Because Elder Sister is precious family.”
Lilia’s skill was truly masterful as she cupped her cheek and cast her eyes down with a touch of melancholy. She knew well from which angle and with which expression to draw people’s sympathy.
It even felt like her skills had improved remarkably compared to the past.
“How can you, Lady Lilia, still shield her after all the hardship she caused you!”
“Good heavens, to be so tender-hearted!”